Goals

1. Support the topic, give reasons why


2. Examples


3. Connect to literature


4. Better word choice


5. Transitions between paragraphs


6. Order of Paragraphs







Monday, October 3, 2011

Breathless

Travis, his sister Emily, Darla who is his girlfriend, and then his friend Cooper are all friends. One day everyone was at the lake and there was a really high cliff. Travis thought that it would be cool if he dived off of it. Everyone was trying to stop him by saying he was going to get hurt, but nothing stopped him. He went up on the rock and dived off. Then when he was coming down he hurt his leg and had to go to the hospital.

Once he gets to the hospital, the doctors are doing studies and they find out that he has Cancer. To him that’s basically the end of his world. He’s the best diver on his school’s diving team and he has so much potential in this sport and now everything is about to be taken away. Darla, his girlfriend was one of the only people always by his side supporting him. Once he started chemotherapy everything went downhill.

Travis was going through chemotherapy, and then the doctors said he had to have his leg amputated. He was really depressed when he found out about this because then he really knew he couldn’t dive again. After all of this and at the same time he is very sick from his cancer treatments, he starts to think of suicide because he is sick of living this kind of life especially with hardly anyone that can understand what he’s going through. While all of this is going on he just keeps getting more weak and sick.

Before anything else can happen one morning Travis dies in the hospital. Everyone was sad but I think to some extent is was a blessing because he was having such a hard time living through everything and with a changed life. His family and friends finally had peace with everything.

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